As many of you know, I run a program in my Chicago neighborhood to put computers in public schools. System maintenance is a bear. Thought some of you might appreciate these "bug" reports. (Bruce, if your staff is not on apo35-general, pass it on. >Date: Tue, 04 Dec 2001 10:58:37 -0600 >From: Benjamin Lorch <ben@walrus.uchicago.edu> >Organization: CUIP >X-Accept-Language: en >To: Don York <don@oddjob.uchicago.edu>, > Duel Richardson <d-richardson@uchicago.edu>, > Mitchell Marks <mitchell@walrus.uchicago.edu>, tra@walrus.uchicago.edu, > nsp-tech@walrus.uchicago.edu, > "Craig A. Cunningham" <c-cunningham@uchicago.edu> >Subject: real tech support > > >Hello All, > >This eminds me a little of our tech support efforts in the schools. > >Enjoy! > > >Subject:Fly Quantas! > > >Aircraft Maintenance Problems and Solutions: Never let it be said that >ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual >logged maintenance complaints and problems, known as "squawks," >submitted >by QUANTAS pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. > > > >By the way Quantas is the only major airline that has never had a fatal >accident. > >P = The problem logged by the pilot. >S = The solution and action taken by the en > > >P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. >S: Almost replaced left inside main tire. > > >P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough. >S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft. > > >P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid. >S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack >normal >seepage. > > >P: Something loose in cockpit. >S: Something tightened in cockpit. > > >P: Dead bugs on windshield. >S: Live bugs on backorder. > > >P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent. >S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. > > >P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear >S: Evidence removed. > > >P: DME volume unbelievably loud. >S: DME volume set to more believable level. > > >P: Friction locks cause throttle levers tostick >S: That's what they're there for! > > >P: IFF inoperative. >S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. > > >P: Suspected crack in windscreen. >S: Suspect you're right. > > >P: Number 3 engine missing. >S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. > >P: Aircraft handles funny. >S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. > > >P: Target radar hums. >S: Reprogrammed target radar with words. > > >P: Mouse in cockpit. >S: Cat installed. > > > > > > >-- > >Benjamin Lorch >Coordinator, CUIP >Chicago Public Schools/University of Chicago Internet Project >Vox 773.834.2159 >Fax 773.702.8212 -- Dr. Donald G. York Horace B. Horton Professor of Astronomy and Astrophysics APO APO APO APO APO Apache Point Observatory 3.5m APO APO APO APO APO This is message 532 in the apo35-general archive. You can find APO the archive on http://www.astro.princeton.edu/APO/apo35-general/INDEX.html APO To join/leave the list, send mail to apo35-request@astro.princeton.edu APO To post a message, mail it to apo35-general@astro.princeton.edu APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO APO